The purpose of this article is to explore the way preschool teachers teach reflective care in Japan. The article builds on a two-month ethnographic study conducted in Japanese kindergartens and nurseries among children aged 3-6 years. The data were analysed using concepts of age and gender. The results show that care in Japan, in contrast to strong discoursers of learning in several western countries, is seen as part of teaching children how to behave in public space together with others. Teaching care tends to be reflectively and thoughtfully planned by the pedagogues. It is organized to teach children self-reliance, using common projects and with pedagogues working with inclusion. Care was seldom analysed in relation to the children's gender but rather in terms of their age or developmental 'steps' such as being able to take care of oneself, take care of the preschool space and care for others. (author abstract)